The ‘FLUTE’ That Took Me Down

If you have or have ever had kids, you know that they bring home some pretty yucky things. Last week, my kiddo brought home, as he likes to call it, the “flute”, otherwise known as the flu to the rest of the human population. So this past week has been a series of fun symptoms, some days feeling great, others feeling like death. It also included a few days away from work. However, that doesn’t mean we didn’t have some fun the past couple weeks though! Enjoy!

Entry under job title: COO/Air Guitarist – yup, someone actually put that on their registration

Entry under Web Address: 1234 Street address – seeing this more often than should be possible

“I don’t have a business card, I tossed them all away” Really? Why would you do that!?

“Wouldn’t the checking account be the same as a letter of intent?” Sure, that’s the same

“She has become unresponsive to my emails. So I’m sending a new email” Yup, that’ll get you a new answer… I gave you the answer 3 times… and you don’t like the answer… but sending a new e-mail, that’s the ticket, I’ve completely changed everything about our policies because you’ve sent a new e-mail

Warning in our own system!

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I just might start using “updation” in everyday language!

Yup – This series of e-mails is all from 1 person…

all-from-the-same-personNotice the time… and they’re upset that we didn’t respond after the first 3 e-mails. Come on people, over an hour writing us multiple e-mails in the middle of the night? Go to sleep!

 

Stupidity at its Finest

Imagine this: So you call into a company, complaining about something and they ask for your information. You provide a very common word, such as Innovate as your company name. The person on the phone types in Innovate (because you didn’t specify anything differently) and cannot find your record. You get very mad at that person and tell the person that they are accusing you of lying and then WALK AWAY FROM THE PHONE cursing. So the person at the company tells your what she can only assume is your wife still on the phone to e-mail the information over so that she can assess further.

When that e-mail arrives the person realizes that you have spelled Innovate as Innov8… Seriously – You didn’t have the intelligence to tell the person on the phone that oh by the way, my company name isn’t spelled like the word!?

AHHHHH!

Is Entitlement the Norm?

Honestly – I love my job! The daily interactions with so many people from all walks of life, from CEOs of major corporations to employees at the local gas station. However, what I don’t appreciate is people who feel that they are entitled to anything and everything they want, regardless of the rules, requests, and without regard to common courtesy.

Today, I was both threatened, that I “better reconsider” someone’s registration because they didn’t want to pay $30, and received the below e-mail.

“If there was a problem with my or anyone registration  how come i did not get an email good or bad we should be getting some thing???????

Do I have to do them ALL AGAIN??????????

EVERYTHING WENT THROUGH FINE, NO ISSUES WHEN I GOT TO THE END.I EVEN ATTACHED EVERYTHING YOU ASKED FOR LIKE LAST YEAR!

I can send you a spread sheet JUST like last year!! this is such a pain whey does not your site work like it is suppose to??????????

I f im having problems so are others, I did not do anything wrong!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

So I pose the question: Specifically, in the workplace setting, is it right to converse with someone for the first time with anything other than utmost respect? Tell me what you think!

I guess I was raised differently, because my mom would have had the wooden spoon out had I spoken to someone like this, regardless of whether I knew them or not, and probably regardless of how old I was!

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Should you need a license to operate a computer?

I consider myself a VERY patient person. In fact, it is a necessity in my line of work. Most of my day is spent assisting people with processes that are seemingly very simple to me, but does not make sense to everyone. But, today, I ran out of patience.

I had a 30 minute phone call today with someone who may want to consider not using a computer…

The first 5 minutes were spent trying to explain what a browser was, and that BING was NOT the browser and typing the web address into the search field was not going to work.

Then we had to discuss WHERE to type in the web address (when I asked what was in the white bar at the top of the screen I was told “H T T P two dots on top of one another and two slanted lines”)

Once we finally got to the correct website for registration, I was asked if everything was to be entered exactly as it was to be printed on the badge (not a terribly uncommon question); then, “do I just enter my e-mail address like normal?” I actually said, “I’m sorry, I’m not sure how to answer that question”

So we make it 2 more screens, and then this is the tricky part… creating a password. Our system does not have any requirements such as word length or must contain a number, HOWEVER, it does tell you if your password is weak, medium, or strong. This person typed in a password into the first field, and when it showed weak beneath the field, typed WEAK in the “confirm password” field… then hit continue… which of course it gave a warning and loaded the page again. This person re-read everything on the badge, confirmed, and again hit continue (without changing anything). They then proceeded to get frustrated, WITH ME, because it kept re-loading the same page. So I asked if there was a red bar with a warning at the top of the page. “I’ll just hit continue again” again I ask – “Is there a red bar with a warning at the top of the page?”  Customer says, “Yes, it says passwords do not match. What does that mean?”

O…M…G – really!?  Calmly I proceeded to answer that it probably meant that what was typed in the first password field did not match what was in the second password field.

OK – Yay – we get pass the password created. Then to the demographic questions… oh no, shoot me now! I had to say – “I don’t know, what DO you <insert question here>” for EVERY SINGLE QUESTION!

Phew, we made it through the questions, we’ve hit continue, the last screen before payment is a bunch of up-sell options so I try to just make things easy and say “bottom button on the left says Complete Registration, select that” before even listening to anything was read to me. And it worked! THEN the really horrible part…

the VERY last screen in our process is the payment screen, where you enter a credit card… This person says, Oh, I don’t have the company card, I’ll have to send this over to work, can I just print this screen? Nope… our registration must be done in one sitting… we’ve just spent 30 minutes of anguish for NOTHING!

Me: “I’m sorry, but payment is due at the time of registration, you’ll have to start the registration over when you have the form of payment as it must be completed in one sitting”

Customer: “oh, you mean I have to pay for the registration? I can just save all this right? It’ll be there when I log back in, correct? Well, that was a waste of time, I guess I’ll just have the office register me, good bye” Click…

Yup… I will forever be asking if someone has a credit card to pay for the registration BEFORE doing anything from now on.

Lesson learned, Good night!

On the Internet!

Just shaking my head

Hi again! No, I did not drop off the face of the earth, though it may have seemed like it. Luckily there were a few fairly quiet weeks in the tradeshow customer service world to coincide with crazy in my personal world.

Nothing earth shattering or ground breaking, but a handful of just, “did that really just happen” type moments to share with you, along with a conversation snip it  (and if you get the reference, you can be my friend)

Hope your week is going fabulously and enjoy some amazing and amusing interactions from the past month!


Me: What state is your company based in?

Customer: Manhattan


Customer having issues filling out a form on our website: THERE IS A PROBLEM WIT REGISTERING TO DOWNLOAD.

Designer’s response to me when I asked if everything was properly working: They need to enable Javascript for their web browser for any of our forms to work… and for the rest of the internet to work.


During registration, By mistake due to over sight I selected Norfolk Island as country, Instead India.


I have tried to register using the link, but it keeps telling me that the email is already being used by someone else. However, that someone else is me.


My CEO wants to know how much it would be for someone right off the street?


(this is exactly what a response to a marketing e-mail said)

Hi Love,

I just filled this out and it’s telling me I need to pay $30. What does that mean? xoxo

LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!​


Paraphrased from a voice mail:

So my mom always made me get on the short bus to school saying I was special, and you are on the website as a specialist, so you should be able to assist me, please call me back.


Me: Type abcdef.com in the white bar at the top of your browser and hit enter

Customer: it says nothing found in search

Me: what browser are you using?

Customer: Yahoo mail

(I think I now know what it is like to work the IT help desk!)


Actual conversation snipit – yes, I love my job!

Bowl screen shot


Did you do that? Warning, you didn’t do that!

I am a firm believer in the saying “if you give a man a fish, he will eat for a day, if you teach a man to fish, he will eat for a lifetime”. So I always encourage those on the other end of the phone to do the registration process themselves, but I will happily walk them through the process. Unfortunately, sometimes that backfires on me… Yesterday, I had one such caller.

(M=Me & C=Client)

C= the system keeps denying my registration

M= oh, that’s not good (thinking, our system doesn’t deny registrations), are you at your computer now?

C=Yes, but I just want you to register me

M= well, it will take less time if you answer the questions over the computer because of the multiple choice options, but I will of course walk you through the process over the phone. (that was apparently improper information)

C=My name is (obviously, not the callers real name) “a..b..c..d..e..f”

M=Are you entering the information into the registration screen?

C=”g..h..i..j..k”

M= Sir, are you at website-a.com?

C=Yes

M=So, you’ll need to fill out the requested information on the screen, first name, last name, company name, and e-mail address.

C=Oh, you want ME to enter the information?

M=mmmhmmm

C=”a…b…c…d…e…f”   pause  “g..h..i..j..k”  pause  “abcdef@ghi.com” pause Now what do I do?

M= Select the Start Registration Button at the bottom

C= OK, now it asks for type of business, I selected that, now continue?

M=Did you also select the sub category for your business type?

C= I selected continue, and it is saying I didn’t select the sub category.

M=mmmhmmm

C=What should I select?

M=Well, what does your company do?

C=I’ll just select this first one – Now hit continue?

M=(Shaking head) Yes

C=So now it’s asking for more information. What is Title?

M=Your job title?

C=I don’t know what that is

M=Um, well, it’s what you do? the description of your job? So on your signature line for e-mails, most people have a job title under their name?

C=So, Sales?

M=Sure! (of course when I looked at the registration after he completed it, it actually said “Saler”)

C=What do I put in the address field?

M=(remembering the article my boss had just sent me about Disney’s approach to the “what time is the 3’Oclock parade”) You’ll want to put your business address in that field, if you’re business is in another country, you’ll just need to change the country field so that you can enter the address in the correct format.

C=Searching for addressentering information So now I hit continue?

M=Make sure to select the check box that says “I agree to the show policies”

C=Hmmm, passport information… “a…b…c…d…e…f” So now do I hit continue?

M=Did you select the check box that says “I agree to the show policies”?

C=I hit continue and I got a warning that says I didn’t select the box that I agree to the show policies.

M=Ok, so check the box that says “I agree to the show policies”

C=Now what, Continue?

M=(screaming in my head) If you checked the box that says “I agree to the show policies” then yes, hit continue.

C=So, when can I get my invitation letter?

M=Since you are a first time attendee, you’ll need to submit proof that your company fits into the category you selected during the first page of your registration. Once you complete your registration, you’ll get an e-mail that explains what can be submitted.

C=My invitation will be e-mailed to me?

M=You’ll receive your invitation letter once your registration has been confirmed, after business proof has been received.

C= OK, so what do I do now?

M=I think you just need to select Complete Registration

C= I don’t see complete registration. there are a bunch of buttons, which one do I choose?

M=Select the one that says Complete Registration, it is the last one in the list.

C=I have Upgrade, Add another, Child Badge, and Complete Registration – Oh, there it is!… Now I need to get my invitation letter, how do I do that.

M=As I explained earlier, you’ll need to submit proof that your company is a retailer. Once we have received that, and approved your registration, you’ll get a confirmation and your invitation letter.

C=Can I have your name?

M=Sure, it’s Sarah – s..a..r..a..h

C=S.a.r.h?

M=s…a…r…a…h

C=S.a.a.r.h?

M=s…..a…..r…..a….h

C=S.a.h

M=Yup. (I’d given up by this point)

C=And what’s your phone number?

M=Umm (yes, this question threw me, coming from a person who just called me), you just called our number, but it is 555-555-5555

C=OK – so for my invitation letter, I’ll just get that via e-mail right?

M=Once you submit proof of business, and your registration has been approved, then yes.

C=OK – I’ll call back. Thanks! ‘Click’

I’ve been told that I am an extremely patient person, but I had to take a walk with the dog and a friend after that call.

Happy Saturday!